When it comes to health and well-being, we’re often told to wash our hands, to eat our vegetables, to move our meat every once and a while to work off that chocolate shake. But aside from being scared away from STDs and pregnancy, told to use condoms (or to practice abstinence), and recently to get vaccinated against HPV, relationship and sexual health really isn’t focused on that much—until, of course, you’re having problems and need to attend couples’ therapy.

Wouldn’t it be cool if sometime in between learning how to share crayons and dissecting cats we were taught something as useful as how to have a healthy, happy relationship? It might be taken for granted that kids and teens should learn this at home, but let’s face it—many of them simply don’t have good relationships—or even any relationships—to witness at home.

Should teens be taught how to pleasure their mates in health class? Well, that’s probably a loaded question. But as adults, we can surely get much pleasure ourselves through treating our mates every now and then. Good, healthy relationships can really enhance our lives, making us happier, more pleasant, and even live longer. Healthy sex lives are also great for stress relief, bonding with your partner, and even reducing the risk of cancer.

Since it’s Pleasure Your Mate Month, for your health, happiness, and just for fun, why not try doing just that? Here are a few things you might want to do.

• Be kind to your mate. We often take out our greatest frustrations on those we love the most because it feels safe—but those harsh comments can stick around for a long time. Make a concentrated effort to say positive things, thank him or her for even the littlest things, and stop yourself when you feel like unloading your day on your mate.
• Do something special for him or her. Treat your mate to a special date, do his or her chores, or help him or her out with a project at school or work.
• Vow to make love more often. It will be just as beneficial to you as your partner.
• Enact a fantasy out that your partner has talked about. If it’s something you’re completely against, try creating a compromise with something that you’re comfortable with. See if he or she might do the same for you.
• Tell your mate what you like. Partners often don’t do this simple thing that can not only add to your relationship, but also prevent conflict.
• Give your mate—and yourself—some “Me Time.” You shouldn’t be together all day, every day—you might get sick of one another quickly! Instead, schedule a night out with the guys/girls and surprise your mate. Then, when he or she is out with his or her friends, spend the night out with your own—or spend it in relaxing and practicing in self-care.
• Teach your teen about healthy relationships—and sex. You don’t have to encourage him or her to have sex with his girlfriend or boyfriend, but you can stress that as a part of a safe and loving relationship, it’s a perfectly natural part of life. Be sure to explain about partner respect, trust, communication, and your own personal values. Share experiences if you wish, or buy him or her a book on healthy relationships.